hot damn

people ask me what it's like driving late nights on the buff bus. and i'm always like, oh the noise? doesn't bother me. so long as they don't mess w/my bus, ya know? but, honestly.. last night was one of the most trying nights of my life.

on the weekends, buses run until 3am. and on saturday there's only one bus for the whole night. and on this particular halloween party saturday, it was me. it was fun at first, looking at all the costumes and watching the drunken revelry. then it got hectic

around 11, i pull into bear creek and a crowd of around 60 people. my bus can hold 44 seated plus however many standing. i couldn't even close the door because people wouldn't listen to me saying i can't close the door until people get off. i'm already getting frustrated at this point.

i pull up to will vill and there are something like 120 drunk kids waiting. people are being trampled. people trying to get off can't cuz everyone is rushing the one door. the on-duty r.a.'s are there waiting for me, and tell me they're calling the cops because we can't control this many people.

from this point on, i do my best to only let on 44 - 50 people at a time. i also start alternating between will vill and bear creek because it's the only thing i can do.

matt finally shows, so does josh, a driver. just knowing someone else is there makes me feel better. when they got on, i was literally shaking. i was so frustrated with people and their lack of cooperation that i was about to flip out. i don't have much experience w/just telling people what to do. i count on people to want to help me out, to understand what's going on and what i need. when they don't do this, i have no back-up defense. and it sucks

everything gets easier at this point, i have two helpers keeping the peace with me. everything goes until i get to the music stop and this girl(guy? we remain unsure) tries to get on. refuses to listen to the situation because she's been waiting 30 minutes and won't wait anymore. it takes 15 minutes to walk home from anywhere on campus. fuck that noise. she tries to force her way on to the bus and matt literally removes her from the bus and sets her down outside. she kicks him and seems about to come flinging at him before backing down. i had already called the cops because i thought it was going to be a knock down drag out fight. so that's twice.

the rest of the night was fairly quiet. some people got mad cuz i wouldn't let them on but overall, the drunks were understanding.

numbers:
cans of keystone light 12
cans of keystone crammed into the heater 2
empty bottles of mickeys 1
glittery snowflakes 5
fire hats 1
devil horns 2
id cards 1
packs of gum that weren't returned w/id cards 1
people who lost shoes while trying to board 10
apologies recieved for bus drama 60
people moved in 6 hours 700

after cleaning and parking the bus, matt and i went back to my apt to enjoy some post work smoke and then denny's. when i passed out after talking to my baby for a while ( i wish he could've been there w/me all night for support), i let my exhausted mind and body float into the abyss.

a good night overall

in case you were wondering

so today i was sitting around wondering, what is the true definition of googly eyes? so here it is, folks, for your wonder and amazement. wikipedia is ridiculous.

this time last year, i could barely plan two weeks ahead. maybe go job searching( i had just quit my old job about this time), maybe go grocery shopping. i spent my free time going to denver w/my bf of the time and hanging out w/my friends. i managed to get most of my classwork done on time and all was dandy.

my life is suddenly overwhelming. i am now engaged to ana amzing guy and i need to graduate on time (i'd been thinking of taking 5 years instead of 4). i work 20 hours a week and my outside of class workload has piled up like mountains of dirt scattered about my apt. i barely eat once or twice a day, and i spend all my free time trying to keep a handle on all the things i have going on, like soccer (we're in round three of the tournament) and not forgetting the friends who have gotten distant for various reasons ( preston's in japan and jeremy moved away) as well as the friends who are right around the corner ( like shawn and company). the rest of my college classes have to be major or core requirements if i want to come anywhere close to a may 2007 graduation. i've yet to face the fact that it might not work. that i might not be able to get through all my major classes in that time. it'll be another summer school summer, probably.

anyone wanna take a crack at this question on my math pretest?



a. 1601 x (10 + 1.06)

b. 1601 x (1 + 1.06)^10

c. 1601 x (1 + 10)^0.06

d. 1601 x (1 + 0.60)^10

im thinking b but only because none of the others make sense....

umm.. i spent like 30 minutes making a post. i clicked 'post' and some how i lost it. so fuck it i dont have the patience. but hawai'i is a blast, i ate at a revolving restaraunt and was proposed to while standing in the ocean watching a sunset. there isn't much more that i could ask for. except maybe a usb cord so i could load pictures. owell. time for snorkeling

two days!
omg i can't wait. things to do between then and now
1. my math hw
2. shower
3. pack
4. study for exam of doom
5. take exam of doom
6. go to other classes
7. work 6 hours
8. sleep 2 hours
9. take a buttload of nodoz
10. catch AB bus at 4am to dia
11. don't miss flight out of oregon to hawai'i. remember what happened last time?

~deep breath~ ok here we go

this past week, i've found out i failed a midterm and i got a written warning about messing up at my job. by 6pm, i had an oncoming headache and nothing to take for it. and i still had 6 hours of driving ahead of me, in rickity buses.

by 8pm, it's killing me. i go home and take 1500mg of acetomenaphen(somebody check my spelling) at 910pm. 930, i'm driving again and it's only worse. i try to not think about it, to ignore it. but it won't go away. it's there, like a powerdrill, slowly making it's way into my temple. it's pushing into my head, through my eyeball and it's painful. i could cry but i can't. i just keep driving until i get a chance to get a hold of the other night driver. fortunately, late night drivers rock, and he tells me to go home whenever. by the time my friend picks me up and takes me home, i am almost paralyzed. every movement, sound and light is driving the drill into my head and making me want to scream.

at 11pm, i crawl miserably into bed and curse the migraine for ruining my evening. i let percocet carry me away in her comforting arms.

this picture makes the hell that was this morning worthwhile. because it gives me something to look forward to.

it's hard to enter a relationship without bringing baggage from previous boys into it. i don't want to do it, but today i did it. and it was handled so well and i feel so much better about it now than i ever did before. i hope this only gets easier w/time.